Paul, On Feb 1 I will stop over in Calgary and will be able to spend an evening with Kevin, Erin and Keri . I will give Kevin some of your ashes which he will put in a locket with his mother's ashes. She loved you as you loved her. A great way to honour and remember you and her. I feel your presence and get your messages. Like this morning finding a birthday card you sent me so long ago which said Dad " I truly wish you health and happiness" Thank you Paul for watching over me/us

Yes, Paul you flew away. I miss you always. I cry now but not for long. Will visit your grave today. I find peace and feel you there beside me. Thank you Paul for watching over us. I feel it. Am happy you are well and good where you are. So, so many good memories. Love always DAD

Paul, We had our moment today when I listened to Neil Young's Bird at the beach. You flew away without us. Shadows on the things we know. I still miss you so much. But I know what you would say to me today. What you would say to me maybe times...and I will go down to OWS!! Love you. Karen

Karen

12 years ago

Paul, I miss you.

So many wonderful memories. !!!!!! He is carrying up rocks to put in front of the bench in Gaspe. He caught a cod at the wharf and when I came home in the evening he had cooked it and we sat and ate it together. That summer he took me over to the Barachois beach to celebrate my birthday. Against Mr. Hamon's advise he crossed the bay in the zodiac '.When he arrived in Perce he was glad to put his feet on land. Love you Paul. DAD

Paul is 5 or 6 We are in the field at Lac Camamant. I see Paul playing with a bear cub. I call to him to run to me. He just continues. I run to him ,take him in my arms and run as the mother bear comes after us. Thank God there was a house near by. The bear turns and goes back to her baby.

Paul was always able to get his curry tasting better than mine. I wondered what the secret was. Then one day he told me,"Just add mango chutney" I hav e since used it in soups and other dishes. A great idea!!!. Just used it this morning and decided to pass on Paul's suggestion. Try it. DAD

The days, the weeks, the months have gone bye and now I realize that Paul has left me with lots of good memories. Good memories that were not easy to focus on until just recently. I remember how happy you were the evening around 11:30 pm when you came to my bed and gently touched my head to wake me up ,as you so often did: "Here Dad put your hearing aids in. Kevin and I have just arrived from Calgary and we are leaving shortly for Gaspe." I still see your great,wonderful smile as you said to me:" I am feeling much better now." I was so happy to see you and Kevin leaving for Gaspe.

Paul is about five or six. We are on our way from the cottage at Cayamant. It is early Spring and the road is really muddy. The station wagon gets stuck. I try to get it our but it sinks more into the mud. Then I hear this little voice, "Dad are you afraid?" I put him on my back and we go to the village for help. An hour later we are on our way home not afraid.

Kevin and Paul, two little kids playing on the shores of Lac Cayamant in billy boots and swimming suits. Their red pail is filled with "pollywogs". The Pollywog Club is founded each being a Pollywog Master. Over the years only special friends were allowed into the Pollywog Club. No more will they play on the shores of Lac Cayamant.

It is late in the evening at the cottage. Paul is about six. He notices a mouse in the cottage and makes a trap: a pail upside down,food under, a small piece of wood with a long string under the edge of the pail. He sits and waits holding the string. He falls asleep me telling him stories of the sea and Gaspe.

Paul is five or six . We are diving back from Florida in the station wagon. Paul sits in his special chair on the front seat between us and ocaasionally plays with the conrols of the radio, the air conditioner,etc. just in front of him.He looks over at me and wonders if I approve. I say to him: "Paul you are in control of that part of the car. That will be your way of helping me drive." The smile is great. The control readily accepted as he says"Ever you go I go ehDad?" I also may add that ,that control was maintained for many years. Always love you , Dad

Michael, beloved dad of Kevin, Keri and Erin Sullivan went all the way to reach you 3 days ago. Hope you share again the love and respect you had for one another! I remember last December 28th sitting on you right at the lovely meal offered by Michael and shared with his loved ones ...you were part of them, ans still are!

Over the years we have spent together my mind is flooded with wonderful , amazing memories of our journey together. You have been precious to me always and always willl be. I have always been so proud of you. I cannot spend to much time on these memories today as it hurts me more than I can stand when I realize I will never be with you that way again. It is comforting to feel the presence of your beautiful spirit and to know that you will always be there that way. You kept the last birthday card I gave you with your personal things on the Chinese cabinet in the living room. I have put that card near your ashes. It shows you jumping in a pile of leaves as a little guy and it reads; "Happy Birthday Paul, I loved you then and love you now" and always ,forever. Dad

One time at Lac Cayamant Paul decided to leave. We watched him walk out the laneway and hide behind a tree. We then decided we would pretend to look for him . We walked out the laneway and turned the opposite direction to where he was hiding. After he watched us go for a bit, he called out " Over her Uupid" He wasn't able to pronounce "stupid". We then made a big fuss about having found Paul.

Sitting with Paul at the last thanksgiving, and talking about the price of gold. I remember driving up in his 4 by 4 a ski slope which he use to ski down as a kid and thinking “ there is no way I would do this”. You know, Paul is a brave man. He made sure everything he did was complete and clean. And the little laugh out of the corner of his mouth, he would say “you think I should do this” and then he would just step on the gas. He would laugh. And this is a steep hill. I was worried. And then I realized something…I knew Paul was doing what he wanted to do. Nobody was going to pull him from it. Paul was going to drive up that hill. Whether we were with him or not. And we should (we will) always look up.

I am so sorry for your loss and may his spirit be the brightness of everyday for you. Benn's Mom Susan

When Paul was just a little guy about 5 years old; the whole family used to go picking berries , in a field ,up on the hill ,in Lac Camament.. We were all involved in the berry picking and I looked around and Paul was not to be seen. I remember being concerned and calling out, "Where is Paul?" Then I saw his litle arm raising up as I heard him say:" Here me am." Today when I ask Paul to be with me, it is like I can still him saying: "Here me am." Dad

When Paul was a very little guy he always wanted to be involved in all the family activites. He often wanted to be with me. I remember at Lac Cayament; I had a very ,very big elm tree cut down ,as it was dying . The tree had just fallen and I saw Paul {about 4yrs old} coming out of the cottage with a small little toy saw in his hand and he immediately began to help saw up the tree.Over the years you have always been there to help me if I ever need it .Today,although you are gone,I still call on you to help me when I need to and I feel you are always there., Much love Dad

Over the years we have had together, my mind is flooded with wonderful memories of our life togethr. You have been God's precious gift to me always and I know that always will be.I have always loved you and will forever. I have been so proud of you ever since you were a litle guy. When you first left us I could not spend much time on those memories as it hurt too much knowing that I will never be with you again. As time goes on I realize you are with me in your spirit and every day I pray for you and I also pray to you.I take comfort in knowing that your beautiful spirit is an extension of the loving, caring, compassionate, intellegent, jovial and wise little person you used to be with us. You were a good boy,a good teenager and good man.

I stood at the top of the mountain and watched you go down as I have done so many times in the past. I could feel your love for the mountain. You loved the speed and with your well deleloped techniques could handle it with ease. When you picked up speed maintaining full control you would spread your arms and I seeming soar as a seagul does here in Gaspe .You loved the air on your face and body and the challenge of the mountain. I often stood in awe and had admiration and pride for my son. My heart aches with pain when I know I will never do that with you again. But what a powerful memory.!!!! It stayed with me this morning.

I loved skiing with Paul. He was always amazed at how well I skied considering I had no formal training. He would always tell me how good I was naturally and what a good technique I had naturally. He always said that I was the best skier of all his sisters! But that we should just keep that between the two of us!! It was our little secret. He used to stop in the middel of the hill and show me the next tactic I should work on for my evolution. I can see him as clear as day bending down with his poles high up and his goggles on backwards. He was happy whne he was skiing.

Paul always would say that to me whenever I was down. I wish I could call him these days.

This week I found Paul's last Xmas present to me; A little plastified card called ''Celestial Seasonings" with a beautiful red St- Nicholas , a white Unicorn, distributing seasonings from a big basket . At the top, a message that I now cherish very much. '' Wonder...is the seed of knowledge '' - Francis Bacon. I was very touched when I found this momento. Now that I know how Paul was so sensitive and thoughtful I wonder if this message had been chosen specially for me? I chose to think so and continue to '' wonder...'' in homage to him. Marthe